My two year old is obsessed with animal videos on YouTube. Her favorite is the GoPro dolphins, but we recently discovered “Ducklings vs. Stairs”.
I don’t know what frame of mind one has to be in to see life lessons in YouTube animal videos, but I guess that’s where I am right now. This spoke to my soul. I decided almost immediately that I needed to blog about this adorable little video, and I’ve been thinking about it all month.
I am a baby duck. Most of the time when mama duck takes me for a walk, it’s pretty smooth sailing. Sometimes the walk is uphill, through the mud, or across a busy street. Sometimes I have to go around a really big rock or jump over a stick. That makes the adventure a little more difficult, but mama duck is in the lead and I can see her the whole time. My fellow ducklings all take turns overcoming the obstacles. We are getting stronger every day.
One day we are following mama duck on a walk as usual, when she stops just for a moment at the bottom of a staircase, and then hops up the first stair. She calls for us to follow, and then hops up the next step, and the next. I can’t see her anymore, but she is still calling “follow me!” The steps are taller than I am. I don’t even know how many there are. How can mama duck expect me to follow her this way? It’s too hard! I don’t even know where she is leading me.
The other ducklings and I are running from one end of the step to the other, hoping for an easier way. One of us begins jumping up as high as he can. He falls a few times, but then he makes it onto the next step. He calls down a word of encouragement before getting to work on the next step, determined not to let mama duck get too far away. She is still calling, “follow me”, but the sound is getting more and more faint. We all begin to wonder if she is going to leave us here. More out of desperation than believing I can make it, I begin to hop. I flap my tiny wings knowing I can’t fly, but hoping they will help me jump just a little higher. One by one my companions start to make the jump, and then I make it too! But all I can see is another step in front of me, just as high as the last.
I am discouraged, but I hear mama duck calling again. She isn’t far. She won’t leave us here in our struggle. It doesn’t take as long to jump up the second step, and the third is even a little easier. One at a time each little duck reaches the top, where we find mama duck waiting to lead us on our way. This is the hardest thing we have ever done, but mama duck knew we were strong enough to follow her up those steps, and now we know it too. Without looking back, we keep on following.
Right now I feel like I am in the middle of my own personal staircase. I have hope in the idea that my Heavenly Father is leading me to some sort of higher ground, but to be perfectly honest I don’t really know what’s going on. About two months ago I was at the bottom of the staircase. I didn’t think at that point that I could jump that high. Not even one step. But I did. And since then I’ve done it again and again. There have been a few times that I’ve felt completely left behind, but then a small miracle comes along. I know again that I am not alone. It isn’t enough to carry me to the top of the staircase, but enough to give me the boost I need to jump to the next step. Sure, it feels good to know I could make that jump, but with another step right in front of me it doesn’t take long before my discouragement settles in again. I am exhausted, sad, lonely, insecure, and even angry sometimes. I don’t know how long I can keep this up since I thought my limit was a long time ago. I don’t know how long this is going to take, and I don’t even really know what’s at the top of this particular staircase.
All of this sounds pretty depressing, and you know what? It is. But through it all, I haven’t lost hope. Hope keeps me going when nothing else is left. I hope that there is actually a point to all of this. That when I get to the end of this obstacle, I will understand what I gained from it. I hope that I will be able to see clearly for a little while as I continue to do my best to follow my Heavenly Father’s plan for me. And I hope that I will make it through this trial with enough grace that I can be a good example for someone else someday, and not a bad one.
We don’t get to see the whole story when we watch this video. It’s hard not to judge the mama duck for not finding an easier way for 12 ducklings to follow her. One of the onlookers even wonders if he should help them. That would have made their lives easier for a moment, but what about the next time they encountered stairs? Sometimes we just need to find out what we are capable of. We get to a point in life where we feel stuck, and the only way out is up. Up a step that is taller than we are. These are the times we find more strength within us than we knew we had. Our Father in Heaven knows we can reach the top of the staircase, or He wouldn’t have brought us this way. I really do believe that with all my heart. That’s what keeps me going, one step at a time.
